Bus Ride

"used to make my tattoo's with baby oil...in the joint"
"you gotta pay like fo' dollas ta even sit in da damn taxi..
and when ya want one...they ain't even there...course you get
here and dey all be sittin around...ton of em...and it be the damn
day you don't need one..."
"si,si"
"yeah, shit, i remember...see this one here...where you think
i got this!"
"...are we skipping or not..."
"that's a nice dress, girl, where'd ya'll get it?"

white man sitting uneasily...arms crossed...his body is folded into
itself like a tense lawn chair...eyes scanning the passengers, seemingly
watching for a sudden move. he doesn't ride the bus often. black men
sprawled out, looking around at nothing in particular, talking with ease...
never look into the eyes of whom they are talking to. two spanish women
in shawls eyes, hands, and mouths running in bursts of speed...retreat into calm
...and burst again. constant whine.
me, heroin hitting...my body slack...warm water pulsing through my veins.
waves of soothing quilted air cocoon me. fading back from the bus. into the
dark.
barely here now.
i close my eyes and shift seemlessly into a dream. my soul, uh, sezs..."gee, there's
only so much a guy can take, i'm outta here me." i see myself clutching violently at
the air as a translucent ghostly shape begins to pull itself off of my physical frame.
the soul works itself off of me, as i wriggle and writhe in agony. it is sperated from me.
a foggy mist hovers over and flies out of the bus window. i hear myself scream..crying, and
scratching at the air. i cry out...."come back!"
......"come baacckkkk!"...is dissolved by a burst of daylight. my eyes open and i feel
the bus rock back from the curb and continue after a stop. i am awake and conscious
of a film of saliva on my cheek. a boy, 16 or so, who i had not noticed before, stares at
the floor rocking back and forth, holding his sides. he moans. i shift my leg as i notice
it is asleep and this makes the boy look up at me momentarily. i stare into deep dark
empty eyes. eyes with no light. the boy looks back down at the ground and a chill runs
through me. a premonition of the future. i deal with it the only way i know how. i close
my eyes, and let sleep take me over again.